Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Closed Doors; Closed Windows

My door's not open for him. I have let him go a few weeks ago. My heart has been broken by him for the "NTH TIME". I cried the last tears for him a few nights ago. I tried to pretend that everything's just normal, but I could no longer take the truth. Truth hurts as they say. I didn't know how many times I have been broken, and I just disn't know either how was I able to put back the broken pieces.
It hurts to see him change without knowing or hearing his reasons. How could he act like nothing ttok place at all and at the same time treating me like I don't exist? I'm only human (as the song goes), I know what's hurting and what's not, I know the difference between I can still, and I can no longer, I know when to weep and when to stop.
From now on, I'd better stop caring about him. I promise to be numb when it concerns him. I promise to treat him as if he doesn't exist or be a total stranger to him. I know this wasn't good but I could no longer withstand the situation, everything that happened would be enough to give him up. If this was what God planned, I'd accept evrything with open arms, if God would say that we have no chance at all to rekindle what we had made before, I'd accept the pain.
I want to end this blog by saying : I'm already fed up. It's hard to continue loving someone who wasn't made for you.


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